This time of year leaves me conflicted, especially since I became a business owner. It plays to my insecurities and I don’t think I am alone. A new year brings new hope, opportunity and a new start, however in equal measure my mind can whirl and create negative pictures driven by inner limiting beliefs and imposter syndrome. A dip into Social Media can help with supportive colleagues and friends but equally, depending upon my mindset at the time of reading, talk of ‘your best year yet’, ‘big scary goals’, ‘six figure salaries’ and fabulous, creative business ideas can either fire me up or leave me feeling intimidated and overwhelmed.
I took a proper break this Christmas, which was unusual and with the usual start of term responsibilities to get my girls back to school and settled it has perhaps taken longer than normal to get my head fully ‘back in the game’. I am now emerging from the fuzz and have reflected on what has helped me create a more consistent, positive mindset. I thought I would share what I have learn’t to help others that may be in a similar space.
Ultimately this is all about you, not others. If you are equipped for success you will achieve what is important to you and that is what counts. So here are my thoughts:
1) Define clear and set realistic goals- Don’t put too much pressure on yourself, break it down to what small steps are achievable and build time in your diary to do it. Keep an eye on sales figures, project stretch goals to keep you focused but adapt as you learn.
2) Create a holistic picture of your goals- what is important outside of work? How can you balance that and set goals that enable you to achieve the holistic picture? Health, family, achievement of life goals for example taking that once in a lifetime holiday are all important. At the end of the year, these things are likely to be what you are particularly proud of. If you are visual person, why not get the colouring pens out and draw what success looks like to you or find pictures and print them off and then stick the pictures on the wall or in a notebook you carry around. This isn’t about creating a work of art it’s about something to remind you of what is important to keep you going at times when you are lacking in energy.
3) Acceptance- there can and will likely be deviations in your plans along the way and accept that as fine. I have a phrase to help with that ‘surrender to the universe’. What could yours be? Sometimes things are mean’t to be and whilst they may not be as you have planned, they will lead to a positive outcome because you will make it so.
4) Acknowledge success- rather than looking at what could have been in 2019, look at all the fabulous things you did achieve. A positive frame of reference on last year can help you create a positive frame for the year ahead. I found out about someone keeping a jar on their desk and every time something really great happened or she felt good about something, however small, she wrote it on a slip of paper and popped it in the jar. For example one of my girls said to me ‘mummy, I had the best Christmas, thank you’ and a
colleague said to me ‘Jo, thank you so much, you always provide me with a really useful perspective’. A jar with lots of slips of paper can be a really useful visual clue to focus on positive achievements throughout the year.
5) Reframe a negative inner dialogue- For every negative thought, stop & reflect on how you can turn this into positive action. Language is important. For example I said to myself ‘I would really like to achieve £x a month sales per month by the end of the year’. A better dialogue is ‘I will achieve £x sales per month by the end of the year’. Naturally it fired me up for success. One word can make all the difference. What would
you need to change?
6) If it is harmful, don’t listen- I stopped looking at other people’s Social Media for a while. It wasn’t helpful to me when my mind wasn’t in a positive place. Now I have plans, energy and positivity I am in a good place to celebrate and support. Don’t feel guilty for protecting yourself, it’s for a very good reason.
So overall my advice would be to take time for you to ensure your head is in the right place. Make a plan that is right for you and commit to the baby steps you have set yourself to get there. It is a cliché phrase but I think it works, this is your ‘journey’ through the year and that is what is going to make you happy and fulfilled.